Somehow I feel I'm evolving.

Was just talking to my friend Raymond about what I feel like I'm going through.

I feel like I'm shying myself away from social activity..feels like I'm disconnecting myself from meeting new people. It's scary. I want to meet new people. I want to get to know more people.

But somewhere deep inside wants to stay comfortable and not be hurt. I feel like the more connected I am to people, the more I will tend to hurt after sometime.-_-"

It's a really weird thing ya. I want to personally meet as many people and get to know them as best as I possibly could, yet this unconscious side of me just hinders me. It's like I have 2 personalities..weird? Hahaha..

I'm not schizo just for your information.

Anyhow, weather in UK is FREAKING cold. There's COLD mist everywhere. So thick man.-_-

Waiting for Song to come back from London so I can get my London pics off him. I need to start studying for my finals soon.:(

Christmas is 5 days away..or 4 since it's 21st now. I don't know what I'm going to do on Christmas. It's a really sad time when you don't have people closest to you to share it with you. This is my 2nd year celebrating Christmas in UK and all I can say is...IT SUCKS! Hahaha.

Despite the cold weather and people all being hyped up bout celebrating Christmas here, it can be really lonely and miserable..I've been through that. I told myself I will never be like that ever again. It puts one into a cycle of depression or emoness. Not worth it.

Hrms. 6 months till my graduation. OMG. It's close.

I'm growing old. I fear being all alone when I'm old. Not having someone to share life with. I admit it here. However, it's not like I'm desperate at the moment. LOL. I actually like my life at this current moment. With no worries bout members of the opposite sex messing up my mind, able to focus on my studies (it gets quite miserable..) and able to focus on improving myself. The feeling is quite liberating actually. It's not to say I don't like anyone at the current moment, it's just that there's nothing I can do about it..so no point worrying. I believe God will provide someone right for everyone.

Hrms. I'm off to bed. I'm really tired and been dying to sleep on my own bed for the past few nights. haha..good night world. I'll try to post up pics of the London trip as soon as I can.:)

Ta.